Monday, February 28, 2011

Fire Starter

I love the yummy smell of wood burning in the morning. 

As I walked baby to school, we discovered a small fire in the foliage by a tree. Someone probably dropped a cig while driving by. 

I told her to stay there while I went and kicked some dirt over it. No prob...  or so I thought.

She was terrified. Why did you do that?! It could have exploded!

I tried to explain that it was just embers. Not a fire. That I just smothered it. "Smother?"  Like stamped it out. "What?" Stomped on it, killed it, dead, no more fire.
 "Was it yellow?"

We continued walking. In the back ground I heard sirens, I smiled at the irony.

Was not funny when they came closer and started circling the area. OMG they are looking for a fucking brush fire. 

"See? You shouldn't have done that with the fire. You could have gotten hurt. It was bad to ...blah blah blah..."

Eyebrows were raising.

She made it sound like I fricken started the fire. I kept trying to explain that everything was ok. But she wouldn't shut the fuck up. So I snapped "WILL YOU STOP IT?!"

Right in front of sexy tattoo'd FILF. Yup.

I smiled like a cheshire cat. Not only am I a pyromaniac, but I am bad mommy potential as well.

On the bright side, it could have been worse... atleast I didn't smack her upside the head.



  1. Awesome for you putting out the fire! idiots can be so careless...

    And I love that pic of the little girl. Priceless.

  2. yep her face is a definite WIN ;)

  3. did she start it?
    the face says it all

  4. ouch. Nothing starts off a day right like being misunderstood by hot men... Hope the rest of your day goes better!

  5. ha ha ha
    i know how that is i yell at mini-me with the worst possible timing, then i sometimes try to play it off and act like this is just how i talk to her and somehow make her laugh so it seems like i'm the best mommy in the world...such a tard i am

  6. Are you still living in Paris? I'm applying for summer jobs there at the moment, v. excited.

  7. There were spots of severe flooding in my town today. I worry I may have invoked the wrath of the water gods for taking too many hot showers. Oopsy.

  8. Shame your poor sister :P

  9. i do so love your posts.

    xx sarah

  10. Just found your blog and i must say i love it :D
    You're so funny x

  11. oh i love you zen, you beautiful woman!

  12. Ha, sounds like baby sister's got some of your genes. Long time no see Zen


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