I have been fasting for 3 days now. Poo is gone, my tush is a water faucet. Yeah, picture my fat water-producing ass for a minute. Lovely.
Caught baby looking at dirty pics online. Apparently she was curious about penis's and she found a marvelous one too.
My first thought was "OMG this kid is scarred forever" my second thought was "Girl, that thing is not a penis, it's a monstrosity".
Any guy she meets in the future will be a colossal disappointment. I felt so terrible for not supervising her better. Baby's computer is now on lock-down.
Scabies. We all got fucking scabies in da house. Apparently it is easily transmitted via sexual intercourse. I am not getting laid, baby sis cannot get an std from looking at pee-pee's on the internet. So I think the culprit is my teen sis.
But It's not like she's gonna willingly let me inspect her koochie. I'd have to hold her down... and that would be just, awkward.