Saturday, February 20, 2010


Yeah, big oops.
Ran into my ex last night. He was nice to me even smiled. I hate him.
Don't get me wrong, I dumped HIM. But everything was ok. We were civil to each other, sort of friends in a weird way.

So he has a new girlfriend. I have been friendly whenever I see her. I smile, wave, have even spoken to her. 
She suddenly decided to hate me, making it very obvious too, with her ugly scowling glares. So my ex  (lets call him "D" for douche bag) has become an evil ass lately too. Being a REALLY big ass to me.

Well, when I saw D last night, I was very surprised at his demeanor. Wtf was that stupid smile all about? He even came over to talk to me. WTF??? Then I realized, OH, he wasn't with his skank. OOOOH, so NOW you can talk to me, eh? Fucken twat. I was cordial, made a bit of nicey-nice small talk. Then made a speedy getaway.

I was stressed. Decided to have a glass of wine, then two, then three. Ooops. There went the diet. I ate.... Greasy Food! I wont go into details, cause I hate even thinking about what is bulging in my gut right now. 

Fucker made me blow my fast. HE MADE ME. 
Eh, I hate this feeling. I wake up out of a sweet slumber and it takes a second to realize, "OH SHIT! I screwed up last night". 

So I am sitting here at my confessional. Telling you all of my sins. Please forgive me. Actually that last part was directed at my hips and ass. Please forgive me hips and ass. I have let you down. I promise to do better.

xoxo zen


  1. Thers always today and tomorrow to do better, hope you are alright

  2. ooh i dont blame you for falling off the wagon, i would have too. just hang in there, and remember that you can make up for any mistake last night by being super good today. dont be too hard on yourself though, guys are asses and i know most of the time i binge is in direct correlation with C.
    stay strong

  3. thank you for your comment :)

  4. Even though it's a little cliched, tomorrow's a new day :) Thank you for the comments technophobia means I think I lost one by accident but thank you. Self acceptance is the most important thing. Take care x

  5. wow is that you in the photo? gorgeous... love the abs... cute top too. that D guy sounds like a loser. and i have to make some confessions to my thighs and hips today too, ugh. weekend's are so tough.

  6. Nooo the pic was thinspo. I will post some current ones of myself soon. I just feel so nekkid whenever I do. Don't worry, I don't mean that literally lol

  7. Thanks everyone. y'all are so sweet. I couldn't make it without you.
    Embre... girl you ALWAYS seem to understand just how I feel? You must be my lost twin! Thanks for the love guys.


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