Tuesday, March 30, 2010

Magic Pills

I received a lot of questions after my last post. Yes 20lbs in one month is fucking insane. 

My current *kickass* weightloss is not due to willpower. I recently asked my doctor to prescribe Topamax for my binge eating disorder.

Here is the original post I made about it... Drugs

When I first started using it, food began to taste funky. Two weeks later I convinced my doctor to increase my dosage. She doubled it from 200 to 400mg daily, and my appetite diminished entirely.

I am not hungry at all anymore.When I do eat, food tastes like dirt, and it also upsets my stomach as if I am already full. I lose about 5 pounds a week. So no, I do not really eat. 

Occasionally I do try. Last night I had a few bites of dinner with my sisters. I like to eat chocolate (in moderation). It's the only thing that still tastes good to me. I can't even stand alcohol! God, I fucking miss drinking!! Actually ALL carbonated drinks taste awful now.

The other day my friends planned on having sushi for girls night. Oooh, I'd kill for that stuff! So I skipped my second pill in hopes of regaining any appetite or sensation of taste. Nope, didn't work.

I (slowly) ate two rolls, they were nice and soft, but still bland. Of course, I wasn't able to drink my beer because it was gross and watery. But it was still a fun night.

The drug raises my body temperature as it increases my BMR. And my hands and feet go to sleep all the time, painfully. But I do have a lot more energy than before which is nice.

Curious... How many of you tried to click on the picture?

Much luvs, 
xoxo zen


  1. I didn't :D click on the picture I mean.
    Okay I really have to try to get those pills ... but it must be horrible not to be able to enjoy food any more.
    poor thing :( :D

  2. gah your amazing! i cant believe that you lost that much. im frothing at the mouth in envy of you lol.
    i totally clicked the picture to see if something funny would pop up(naked fat chick/gross food/scary face). whew, i probably looked retarded , half covering my face and preparing to scream in horror as i leaned away from the computer screen and clicked the picture :P
    im glad you got the chance to have a fun night out. you really deserved a night of eating food that didnt taste as bad as dirt.
    then again i think sushi tastes like sweaty gym socks...
    stay strong

  3. Need. Those. Pills. I think I mentioned that before. Is it a french doctor prescribing them, or american?

  4. gaaah, why isn't there a glbal black market for ED girls like us? there is now way one could get suhcpills that easily here in germany -.- especially not me
    gahhh..... want those pills,need those pills UUUUUUNFAIR !!!

  5. Haha, I totally tried to click :P I want those!
    Congrats on the loss, hun <3

    xoxox alisson

  6. I wish so badly that I could get those pills.
    Well done on your weight loss :)

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  8. ZEN! Where have you BEEN my whole life? :P

    I emailed you...about the pills. They came in. They're waiting for me at K's house, but I wanted to get your official low-down on what I should expect, what I should not do, blah blah blah...Unless, of course, you'd rather just let me die from my own curiosity...That's cool, too. :P

    Loooooove yoooouuu!!!

  9. Oooh, just shot ya email P.D!!

  10. O.o I just found your blog. Way to go Zen! I've been thinking about getting Topamax for some time now. I've read studies of it being used to combat anti-depressant weight gain (something I've been suffering). Thanks to your glowing review I sucked it up and ordered some (after reading copius reviews of the pharmacy of course). Congrats on all your loss!

  11. I want pills!!!
    ....I clicked.

  12. I'm going to ask my shrink about this. I'm on antidepressants and while I'm not gaining weight, my weight loss efforts haven't budged, so I'll blame the anti-depressants and ask about Topamax. Thanks for the tip! :D

  13. OMG! Want those pills!! They sound absolutely brilliant! Google? Purchase... may hvae a look

  14. I WANT THOSE PILLS!! i would never get them :/ i'm 18 and i couldn't go and be like hey give me those pills .. i'm not 'fat' but i still am or i'm not overweight u know

  15. i read somewhere it's used for migrains .. is that true!? cause if so i could definately get it !! :D

  16. OMG YOU GUYS !! my mom had topamax in her drawer !!!!!!!! i just took half ... i don't know how much i'm supposed to take it's 50mg so i just took 25


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