Caught my little sister "sexting" last night. I playfully grabbed her phone away to see what she was so immersed in. She hadn't come out of her room all night.
I was so shocked. She is too fucking young and innocent to be talking like such a slut. That kind of shit is reserved for girls like me. I know, I know. She is growing up. She finally likes boys. I am going to have to give her some space... blah blah FUCKING blah. Screw that!
Her life is over now because I refuse to give her cell phone back, she's acting like I severed off one of her limbs. Oh fucken well. Atleast you will die a virgin. God help me, am I turning into an old fart? Or an embarrassing pajama wearing mom who walks you to school and kisses you in front of your chums? No. I am just the hypocritical big sister who has been there! At her age I was already partying and I do not want to see her go down that same skank ass road.
She is so modelesque. Beautiful. Graceful. Thin. She does not need to impress boys by sending them naughty pictures of herself. Or massaging their egos by talking about their big pee-pee's. As-if she even knows what a penis really even looks like, right? Right?!
Deep breath zen, DEEP breath.
Ok, a boy just texted her and said "you look hot today". So I texted back "I just peed my pants, so I gotta go home. C-ya tomorrow." heh heh haaaaah haaaaah!! Oooh I'm gonna scare away all of her boy-toys, one text at a time. Awww shit, I was giggling so much at my own hilarious antics, that I think I just peed myself (a tiny bit). Karma much?
I was so shocked. She is too fucking young and innocent to be talking like such a slut. That kind of shit is reserved for girls like me. I know, I know. She is growing up. She finally likes boys. I am going to have to give her some space... blah blah FUCKING blah. Screw that!
Her life is over now because I refuse to give her cell phone back, she's acting like I severed off one of her limbs. Oh fucken well. Atleast you will die a virgin. God help me, am I turning into an old fart? Or an embarrassing pajama wearing mom who walks you to school and kisses you in front of your chums? No. I am just the hypocritical big sister who has been there! At her age I was already partying and I do not want to see her go down that same skank ass road.
She is so modelesque. Beautiful. Graceful. Thin. She does not need to impress boys by sending them naughty pictures of herself. Or massaging their egos by talking about their big pee-pee's. As-if she even knows what a penis really even looks like, right? Right?!
Deep breath zen, DEEP breath.
Ok, a boy just texted her and said "you look hot today". So I texted back "I just peed my pants, so I gotta go home. C-ya tomorrow." heh heh haaaaah haaaaah!! Oooh I'm gonna scare away all of her boy-toys, one text at a time. Awww shit, I was giggling so much at my own hilarious antics, that I think I just peed myself (a tiny bit). Karma much?
umm... how about some lingerie thinspo to fit the mood? Yeah? OK.
aaaha.... yummy! WTF is on her panties though, eh?
God I've been there. My sister is 14, I'm 18, and she was dating this 16 year old... I freaked out. So hypocritical. But there is a big difference between a 14 y/o girl and a 16 y/o boy...
ReplyDeleteGah. Such a hypocrite. It's for their own good though, right?
No, it really is. How old is your sister?
I'm pretty sure it's Elvis on her panties! I'm more disturbed by the dude's undies and the fact that it looks like there's a monster mouth on his bulge.
ReplyDeleteHa ha ha loving the dude's freakish undies lol.
ReplyDeleteHow old is your lil sis? And quite right, there's no need for her to be sending saucy pics of herself to guys. It doesn't impress them at all, just makes them think they'll get away with disrespecting her in the longrun...
Love the shoes in the first pic :)
She is turning 14.
ReplyDeleteI don't think his package is that big, the awful pattern on his undies is fucking with our minds.
Oh fuck yeah, love the shoes, and her cami. Hot pink is so sexy.
oh god that sounds horrifying! GO ZEN for texting that boy back and killing his little boner! lmao
ReplyDeletekids just grow up so fast now a days. granted i wasnt much better but at that age but they dont fully understand that if they send naked pics of themselves they may as well expect EVERYONE at school to see them. that happened to 3 different girls when i was in school. one of them had to finally move because she got teased so much.
i threw up in my mouth alittle when i saw that guy in his gloriously tiny man-panties.
the girls panties looks like she wiped her ass with those things...or elvis. same diff.
stay strong
meg
Hahaaah
ReplyDeleteyou are so MEAN!!!! Impressive! Scare those little boys!
Oh I would just love to know what your sister did to make boys text her like this. Haha. She must be one naughty girl. How old is she again?
you always sound like a mother. All the time. It's so cute because it's so obvious that you're not. Lovely.
Bloody hell, you're looking at her panties? I cannot stop wondering about HIS pants!!! Jesus.
14, i can't even remember what i was doing back then lol. but that is kinda mean girl! calling ur sister's potential bf a boy-toy lol, then texting him back! damn, u got some guts haha.
ReplyDeleteand the thinspos were all great, until i came to the very last one. the dude's freaked me out pretty bad - what's up with the crazy color scheme? lol /xo
I didn't even HAVE a cell phone until I was 18! Now little girls are sexting?? What has the world come to! She is lucky she has you looking out for her, even though she probably is not appreciating it right now.
ReplyDeletei hope i never catch my brother doing... anything.. ANYthing omg that would be horrifying...
ReplyDelete*wishes her bf would wear cool panties* lol
i eat when im happy, or angry, or bored, and usually when im depressed im too sad to eat. weird. or sometimes watching certain movies makes me want to eat. or certain songs. or certain friends i hang out with or pretty much anything idk its very odd.... i get triggers from the weirdest places.
I want to comment on how awesomely amazing this post is in every possible way, but I'm buzzed and exhausted and bothered with myself, and it's hard to concentrate on my words... I always want them to come out right, you know? Sometimes they don't.
ReplyDeleteI wish you had AIM or Yahoo messenger or something. Maybe you do. Maybe you don't. How the hell am *I* supposed to know? :P
What I MEANT to say was, "If you have some sort of messenger or IMing component, I think it'd kick some major ass to be able to complain to you in real time...sometime...
I'm so tired, Zen. So tired. And consuming liquid calories to make it "better?" It only makes it worse.
At least this post made me laugh three separate times. Yes. Thank you for that.
I shall go now...and read blogs...and try to remember that just because I'm drinking alcohol does not mean I can raid the kitchen. NO, P.D., NO! *slaps own hand*
This is gonna be hard.
...Well, at least it was handled...
ReplyDeleteo.O
Wow, sexting already? She'll thank you someday for scaring her boy-toys away. She doesn't need that shit to make her feel pretty or wanted. Or worthwile.
ReplyDeleteBut then again, I remember how I used to be when I was 13-14. I wish I had a sister who protected me like you protect your lil sis.